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I think Brody has the best advice for you here, find a good, small RP Mud, something that reads on mudconnect with less than 10 players. Those types of environments are very playerfriendly, because they want more people to play with. So they'll be more likely to nurture your need for social interaction and to help bring it out more.
You'll be more likely to be asked to "group" or at least to join into the roleplay, and you'll also be more likely to learn to speak up because of your close relationship with the people of the MUD. I once wrote a paper on how virtual worlds can modify someone's psychological state in the *real* world, and help to counsel certain pyschological problems, especially if used in conjunction with other psychotherapy.
Another thing you'll want to keep in mind is that in the end you are anonymous. If you embarass yourself, you're not going to have to look these people in the eye, so go ahead and be social. Don't worry about embarassment or emotional failure, and I think in time you'll be able to overcome your social anxiety. Both in the games, and outside of them.
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