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Molly · 09-19-2002, 05:30 PM

Heh, I really feel that this subject would have gone better in the Builders’ Forum, or even in the Humour Forum, and I have small doubt that KaVir will be moving the thread before long.

Still, I find the topic kind of fascinating, probably because I grew up with brothers and sisters who found jokes about pee and poo hilarious. Consequently, when I was a very new Builder in my first mud, I wanted to put a virtual toilet in one of my zones. As far as I recall, my idea was to have some echoed messages outside a certain room, telling you that you needed to go to the toilet. Then I’d make a Men’s Room, where a slimy, green THING would slither out of the toilet and bite off your… umm… handle, when you opened the lid. You then could get your revenge by killing the slimy Thing of course.

The Implementor refused flat out. She said that she was once in a mud where they implemented bodily functions, and all the players left. I can believe that, in case they actually implemented it in a similar way as hunger or thirst. God knows the players whine enough about having to eat and drink, and having to find a toilet once an hour would most likely be the last straw.

However, I too find that manure lends some 'atmosphere' to a mud - (even if it's a bit rich) - and in the mud I run now, we use it quite a bit, although we are not quite as sophisticated as Burr seems to suggest. For example, I always put a large heap of manure outside each livery stable. And there is a castle with a toilet designed in the Medieval upper class fashion, an oriel overhanging the moat, with a hole in the floor and a sheer drop. And if you go to a place in the moat directly under this facility, you’ll find that the water of the moat is particularly muddy, stinking and disagreeable in this particular spot. (Consistency in the zones is one of my little hobbies).

I also implemented the virtual toilet with the slithery green thing in one of the Future zones (actually the bite diminishes you to the size of a bug, which makes it possible for the player to enter the sewers, where they can fight interesting things like bugs, bacteria and viruses). And last by not least, there is a public toilet in one of the medieval villages, with the usual Medieval lower class design of a pole stretched over a heap of manure. In the street outside this facility, you’ll be spammed by a series of messages telling you how much you need to go to the toilet, getting more and more urgent, and finally, unless you enter the public toilet and sit down on the pole, ending in the laconic message:
’You just peed in your pants’.

As for using manure as firewood or fertiliser – why not? Our mud has both farming and gardening as features, some manure might spruce the growth up a bit. And perhaps it could also be used as an ingredient in potions? After all we already use disgusting things like bat wings, dried spiders, tongue of toad and eye of newt for that, so why not horse manure?

Oh, and by the way, my first and favourite weapon as an imm was ‘a big heap of bull****’. Manure can be used for so many things, can’t it?

09-19-2002, 05:30 PM	#3
Molly Senior Member Join Date: Apr 2002 Location: Sweden Home MUD: 4 Dimensions Posts: 574	Heh, I really feel that this subject would have gone better in the Builders’ Forum, or even in the Humour Forum, and I have small doubt that KaVir will be moving the thread before long. Still, I find the topic kind of fascinating, probably because I grew up with brothers and sisters who found jokes about pee and poo hilarious. Consequently, when I was a very new Builder in my first mud, I wanted to put a virtual toilet in one of my zones. As far as I recall, my idea was to have some echoed messages outside a certain room, telling you that you needed to go to the toilet. Then I’d make a Men’s Room, where a slimy, green THING would slither out of the toilet and bite off your… umm… handle, when you opened the lid. You then could get your revenge by killing the slimy Thing of course. The Implementor refused flat out. She said that she was once in a mud where they implemented bodily functions, and all the players left. I can believe that, in case they actually implemented it in a similar way as hunger or thirst. God knows the players whine enough about having to eat and drink, and having to find a toilet once an hour would most likely be the last straw. However, I too find that manure lends some 'atmosphere' to a mud - (even if it's a bit rich) - and in the mud I run now, we use it quite a bit, although we are not quite as sophisticated as Burr seems to suggest. For example, I always put a large heap of manure outside each livery stable. And there is a castle with a toilet designed in the Medieval upper class fashion, an oriel overhanging the moat, with a hole in the floor and a sheer drop. And if you go to a place in the moat directly under this facility, you’ll find that the water of the moat is particularly muddy, stinking and disagreeable in this particular spot. (Consistency in the zones is one of my little hobbies). I also implemented the virtual toilet with the slithery green thing in one of the Future zones (actually the bite diminishes you to the size of a bug, which makes it possible for the player to enter the sewers, where they can fight interesting things like bugs, bacteria and viruses). And last by not least, there is a public toilet in one of the medieval villages, with the usual Medieval lower class design of a pole stretched over a heap of manure. In the street outside this facility, you’ll be spammed by a series of messages telling you how much you need to go to the toilet, getting more and more urgent, and finally, unless you enter the public toilet and sit down on the pole, ending in the laconic message: ’You just peed in your pants’. As for using manure as firewood or fertiliser – why not? Our mud has both farming and gardening as features, some manure might spruce the growth up a bit. And perhaps it could also be used as an ingredient in potions? After all we already use disgusting things like bat wings, dried spiders, tongue of toad and eye of newt for that, so why not horse manure? Oh, and by the way, my first and favourite weapon as an imm was ‘a big heap of bull****’. Manure can be used for so many things, can’t it?