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You make some very good points - it might be better if any cross-referencing was done only with insignificant people from a character's background. No mentors or family - only acquaintances. No matter how detailed your background is, it's never going to mention every person you've ever met - but if your character happened to fight at the famous Battle of Beerkeg Mountain, and so did mine, there's a good chance they might "remember" each other. Our characters might even remember each other from sword class, or something like that. This would still provide a way to introduce players to each other, but without the risk of disrupting any of their backgrounds.
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