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The key difference, and it's an important one, is that a sane person could see 'free' and not get the interpretation you're giving it (and I suspect many would not), but there isn't enough crazy and/or psychadelic drugs in the world to give 'balanced' the implication in your counterexample.
I've done volunteer work with retarded children. They'd understand the difference between these two scenarios. That you're seeming not to strikes me as disingenous, the sort of theatrical stupidity put upon to try to make a point. It's not exactly working.
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