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Old 05-24-2005, 11:06 AM   #1
Brody
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I'd like to hear from players whose characters have been involved in same-sex relationships, and how those relationships were received from an in-character and out-of-character perspective by others in-game. Did it cause grief for you behind the scenes or were people rather accepting? Was it a source of RP fodder for people trying to scandalize your character? How difficult (if at all) was it to develop and forge onward with these characters?
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Old 05-24-2005, 01:12 PM   #2
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I've played limited relationships of this type, between females, where there was less a capital-R gettin-married sort of thing going and more a casual fling type thing. I don't think anyone noticed, to be honest, but the theme was such that it wasn't a big deal. They didn't even walk around holding hands, though there was a bunch of hugging and stuff, and I imagine people thought that was 'just friendly'. So, little experience, but no social consequence.

It's something I'd like to experiment more with on Chiaroscuro, where there's an emphasis in two seperate cultures on avoiding pregnancy before marriage, and a somewhat patriarchal society in both cases. It seems like it might be a good (discreetly done) socially acceptable outlet. I definitely play female characters who are interested generally in female characters there, and that seems to be a little outre, but fine (yes, well, isn't that cute, whatever floats your boat hon, they say). That sort of patronising, leave-it-be response has happened only with potential stuff, though, and not when the char was faced with actual evidence of such a relationship.

Out of character, I have had no trouble as yet.
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Old 05-24-2005, 03:24 PM   #3
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I made one character of mine bisexual... and when I met people I knew from that character on a more OOC basis, they assumed that I was either bi or a lesbian. It was accepted ingame, but out of character I was met with questions like, "So when did you know you were gay?" and statements such as, "You're a sinner!" etc. I'm not a lesbian, nor am I bisexual, so this was an interesting thing to encounter.

Just thought I'd share ^_^
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Old 05-24-2005, 04:29 PM   #4
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I played an androgynous dragon that had relations with a spectre, does that count? Hah.
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Old 05-24-2005, 07:14 PM   #5
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In Armageddon's world of Zlanthas, there is little to no stigma associated with gay/bisexual relationships. In such a harsh world, a '****buddy', for lack of a better term, is only that. There are no religion, moral, or social taboo's associated with same-sex relationships, and it can make for some interesting situations.

I, the player, am very straight. While I can appreciate another man being handome or, rarely, aesthetically pleasing, I just am not attracted in such a way. InGame, however, I was once pursued by another male. I played hard to get with this guy, claiming to have a female companion somewhere who would, likely as not, find this guy and confiscate his balls. It all made for some very fun storytelling, and I had a blast.

As for others having Out of Game problems with the situation, I say: Screw you. If I want to play a promiscuous, man-hungry half-elven teenager, by God I will. I think if I -did- get harassed for such a thing, I would quickly notify my Mud's immortals. They're quick to stomp on anyone like that. We have enough hatred and bigotry in the Real World. When I'm in my chosen fantasy-world, I'll reserve my hatred for elves and the occasional gith.

-WP
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Old 05-24-2005, 07:18 PM   #6
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I've yet to attempt to RP a character of the opposite gender, so trying something like that would be quite out of my, eh, league. If I did it would be a female, even though I would screw it up quite badly. Becuz dudez r icky!

I wouldn't have any OOC problems with someone playing their character that way, although if it were deemed wrong and/or evil by IC standards my characters would likely flame away, as they tend to do with everything else.
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Old 05-24-2005, 07:30 PM   #7
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I love playing the muscular clean-shaven bigot that picks on gay people IC, it's to kill those people too.
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Old 05-24-2005, 08:25 PM   #8
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Quote:
Originally Posted by
If I want to play a promiscuous, man-hungry half-elven teenager, by God I will.
Warhound, you make me giggle. And I completely agree about the hatred and bigotry issue... and I think it's one of the many reasons that MUDs are so popular. I am, for one, an escapist, so... yeah.

And Delerak silly, you play the muscular clean-shaven bigot that picks on gay people OOC, too! *snicker* I jest, Delly, I jest.
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Old 05-24-2005, 09:10 PM   #9
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Exclamation

And you play the bouncy, tree-hugging activist that can't keep her premature, innocent of the real world views off of mud forums, I jest Kopri... I jest.
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Old 05-24-2005, 09:12 PM   #10
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Oo, look, we're both jokingly observant ^_^

Back to the topic at hand, I'm very interested in everyone else's experiences.
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Old 05-24-2005, 09:13 PM   #11
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[Off-topic]

Delly - heh.

[/off-topic]

Anyway. I'm a 100% hetero female with an artistic appreciation for sexuality and physical beauty in women. In otherwords, I can acknowledge that Michele Pfeiffer is hot, but I don't know that I'd have all that much interest in sleeping with her (bad example since I probably -would- consider it, at least).

In my gaming experiences though, I play -all- my female characters as either bi-sexual, or "open minded" when it comes to sexual preference. I do this for RP purposes - you never know when bedding down with a noble lady will get you the secret information you need for your spy-ring boss.

Only one of my characters has been a full-fledged bonafide lesbian.

Most of the time, what the player thinks about it on the other side of the computer connection is irrelevant since most of the time we "fade to black" any graphic scenes.

Once in awhile things might get roleplayed, and the only reason I would care who they are on the other side, is because I have -no- desire to roleplay sex scenes with a minor.

Other than that, I don't care if they're male or female. It isn't "me" who's having a relationship with "them" afterall. It's my character having a relationship with theirs. Anyone who can't seperate the two needs to take a break from gaming and re-visit their reasons for playing in the first place.
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Old 05-27-2005, 11:54 AM   #12
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Excellent discussion so far. Anyone else have experiences or thoughts to share on this topic?
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Old 10-11-2005, 08:00 PM   #13
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I play a character married to another male character in my primary MUD. There has been only rare OOC issues with this, but a handful of IC issues have cropped up. Overall, though, I have been surprised how little of a reaction it gets in the game world.
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Old 10-12-2005, 05:59 AM   #14
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I have yet to make a non-heterosexual character in either my current MUD (Armageddon) or my previous RP MUD, though I know what to expect.

Armageddon is unusually free and loose about sexuality, really, at least in my experience. Though I haven't heard of this happening yet, it's perfectly possible to hire a prostitute for another character, so...yeah.
As in probably any other MUD, male homosexuality is much rarer than lesbianism in Armageddon, but neither are looked down on.

Back in my old RP, I once saw a male homosexual couple. Personally (OOCly) I had nothing against that, but ICly the combination of the ignorance of my character and the general theme of the game did lead me to haze them about it In-Game. OOCly, I strongly believe that they were not offended.

Anyway, playing a character with any sexual tendency or perversion is completely acceptable as long as they are being played realistically. If your character has some weird fetishes in-game, expect to receive odd looks in-game if the game theme would merit that. Roleplay MUDs are a communal effort and not anyone's personal sandbox.
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Old 10-12-2005, 08:54 AM   #15
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Though I've never had a same-sex relationship IC or OOC, I will say that I've never seen anyone who has have any problems in Lusternia, or any IRE game. In general it seems the internet community is more progressive than the wider world, so I've rarely seen this come up at all in any online area.

P.S. Having just asked around my gay friends that play, none of them have had any problems with it or heard of anyone that has either.
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Old 10-12-2005, 09:12 AM   #16
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Quote:
Originally Posted by (Qud @ Oct. 12 2005,06:59)
Back in my old RP, I once saw a male homosexual couple.  Personally (OOCly) I had nothing against that, but ICly the combination of the ignorance of my character and the general theme of the game did lead me to haze them about it In-Game.  OOCly, I strongly believe that they were not offended.
Well, I am also gay in real life. When I first created my character, he wasn't sexualized at all. I decided he was gay later, when I realized that so few same sex relationships in the game world were male, and there were so many lesbian relationships IC.

One of the reasons it took so long for me to decide to have my character develop as a gay man was because I experience enough homophobia in real life, and didn't think I would find roleplay involving fighting homophobia very fun. After all, I play to escape real life, not recreate it

Having said that, dealing with homophobes IC, although it isn't FUN, doesn't really offend me OOC. I just find it somewhat hackneyed, for lack of a better way of describing it. I also worry, when it happens, about new players seeing it, and assuming the exchange somehow reflects a bigoted playerbase.

What DOES **** me off is when people make ignorant remarks on the OOC channels, but that rarely happens any more.
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Old 10-12-2005, 10:44 AM   #17
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I think a big part of the reaction (Or lack thereof) springs from two points.

1) Because the game is text based, the visual aspect of seeing a gay couple interacting is absent. All you have are two names on a screen kissing/cuddling/holding hands/whatnot. You know they're both of the same gender, but there's not that impact that comes from actually SEEING it. (Especially since men are for the most part, visual creatures, and it SEEMS men, for the most part, are the more vocal in terms of their predjudices.)

To use a real life example, I know people who have no problem with gay/lesbian relationships as a principle, but grow uncomfortable around my gay friends when they're all 'coupley', so to speak. (But then again people also get uncomfortable around hetero couples getting coupley, so I s'pose it's not that good of an example.)

2) In most MU*s there are a large number of Interracial relationships. (Catfolk and Humans, Nymphs and Elves, Dryads and Treants, Bug things and snake things, etc.), People already SEEM to look upon this as 'normal' in polyracial societies, so it's not that far an extrapolation to include same sex couples.

Meh, Just my two items of base currency on the matter.
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Old 10-27-2005, 10:42 PM   #18
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Quote:
Originally Posted by (Maelgrim @ Oct. 12 2005,11:44)
In most MU*s there are a large number of Interracial relationships. (Catfolk and Humans, Nymphs and Elves, Dryads and Treants, Bug things and snake things, etc.), People already SEEM to look upon this as 'normal' in polyracial societies, so it's not that far an extrapolation to include same sex couples.
I typically avoid games with cliched races that appear to be less races than organisms of a different genus and species altogether (like cat-people and bird-people and lizard-people). Always strikes me as odd that people don't treat relationships between "Catfolk and Humans" as bestiality more than interracial relationships.

As for same-sex relationships in MUDs, I've noticed as both a player and a former-administrator that the primary example seems to be lesbianism. Most of the time, it's a female character played by a male player and less of an attempt at a character who happens to be a lesbian than it is a raging-hormone-boy intent on MUDsexing.

As far as actually RPing a same-sex relationship, different people have different ideas about it. If someone's going to try such a character, they ought to do a bit of research rather than play the character based on stereotypes. That advice of course goes for any role.

Take care,

Jason
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Old 10-28-2005, 12:12 AM   #19
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Quote:
Originally Posted by (prof1515 @ Oct. 27 2005,23:42)
As far as actually RPing a same-sex relationship, different people have different ideas about it.  If someone's going to try such a character, they ought to do a bit of research rather than play the character based on stereotypes.  That advice of course goes for any role.
This actually reminds me of a person who accused me once of not playing a gay character very convincingly, because gay men do not have "emotional" relationships such as I was portraying. The person felt I was "feminizing" my character too much She suggested I research gay relationships some, and make a new character that follows a lustful philosophy.

I wasn't sure if this was a stereotype about men in general (i.e. all men are sex obsessed unemotional sluts), or a rather stupid belief about gay guys specifically, but in any event, telling her the player was gay, and I am indeed capable of having emotional ties to the men I have sex with, was HOPEFULLY a good learning opportunity for HER

That said, in one sense, she had a valid point. I think when roleplaying, it is very easy to fall back on stereotypes, since in a text game, emoting behaviors associated with a specific group establishes your character a lot faster in people's minds than portraying something like race/gender/sexual orientation in a subtle and realistic way. If I were to play a flamboyant sex obsessed character, he certainly would be perceived as gay much more quickly in the game
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Old 10-28-2005, 01:48 PM   #20
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Always strikes me as odd that people don't treat relationships between "Catfolk and Humans" as bestiality more than interracial relationships.
Agreed.  We frequently decry "humans in funny suits" syndrome to the playerbase.  Our most successful efforts have be to make sure different races play differently (different limb structure, skills/etc. inherent to a given race, etc.) in a mechanical sense, which seems to keep it in the forefront of player minds more.

Quote:
Originally Posted by
As for same-sex relationships in MUDs, I've noticed as both a player and a former-administrator that the primary example seems to be lesbianism.  Most of the time, it's a female character played by a male player and less of an attempt at a character who happens to be a lesbian than it is a raging-hormone-boy intent on MUDsexing.
Boy howdy, is that true.  We've had several well-executed homosexual characters, and unfortunately a hundred of the kind you've described.
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