[Badger]

[Amnon]

[Badger]

[Jaenelle]

Or you could be like my roommate... who dumped her real life boyfriend who lives with her... in favor of someone she knows On Everquest... Significant Others have a reason to be worried about people you become attached to online... Enough people meet through muds and other online games and end up together in real life that you need to be very careful that your ic gf remains ic and that ooc you aren't attached to her in that way...

[John]

Here's an idea no-one has suggested. Ask her.

With all due respect and meaning no offense, ma'am, your roommate is the pure abstract culmination of all that is evil and despicable in this world, and deserves to have a dull, splintery wooden stake driven through the hollow blackness which we very loosely call her heart.
Meaning no disrespect, of course.

[jornel]

Or maybe, after spending some time interacting ic with other people, she realized what a dolt she was living with?  How can this be considered 'evil?'

As to ic/ooc relationships, if the feelings are real, then its real enough to cause harm to other relationships.  Genuine intimacy ic  is still genuine intimacy.

Maybe the desire to have a relationship with someone else ic, is based on some dissatisfaction that person has with their ooc partner.  If there is still value in that ooc relationship,  talk it over and sort things out.

[Derk]

A lot of it depends on if the IC girlfriend is roleplay or not. All of the IC girlfriends I have had were just for status or whatever, it wasn't serious and I wasn't emotionally involved. Kind of like joining a guild, or a city.

A lot of them I was really good friends with OOC too... that just always seems to work with me.

If I found myself getting attached to any of my IC girlfriends, I would consider it cheating. And while it appears that only I know if I am getting attached, someone who is in a relationship with you CAN TELL when your heart is somewhere else. And once you are cheating period, you need to reevaluate and do some self-examination.

And converserly, communication is important in any relationship. Some people have open relationships that actually work. Its all about needs, if a game is providing needs your partner cant.. thats something to look at. The one thing a real life girlfriend wants to feel, is that she is valued more than any other woman. No one likes to feel second best.

I used to think IC relationships were stupid and pointless. Now I reconsider. Take the girl who left the guy she was living with and married some guy on evercrack. I don't know any details on the situation.. but imagine this.

A large amount of males only value females for their bodies. Its quite possible she discovered the wonderful world of.. oh my god I have something else to offer a man besides sex, online.

On the other hand, A large amount of females only value themselves by their body. The cold reality hits online that they may have a perfect body, but it doesn't matter and they have to actually be nice and provide something a little more.

Just my $0.02.

[Fifi]

There is a lot to be said for having a clear separation between our real and our fantasy lives.

[Erekose]

Depends on the IC girlfriend, depends on the OOC girlfriend. I don't think this is something you can lay down rules written in stone on, because everyone's personal values on it will be different.

I doubt very much that I'll ever get married on a MUD again. Last time I did that, it caused no end of trouble, and I suspect my life would be a whole lot simpler if I never had. Instead, I've got the fun and games of trying to sort out green cards whilst I work on marrying my Mudspouse in RL. Let this be a lesson to you all ;)

[OnyxFlame]